This is the season of giving and I am preparing my most significant donation: my anatomical gift.

An important folder. A tasteful green with a subdued design sits on my desk, It holds important papers. I need to sign those papers and I will. I know there is a deadline—quite literally—but I just don’t know when that will happen.

So why am I procrastinating? Because those papers make real my intentions for after I am gone. While those intentions are firm, they have until now had no legal force. So, the papers draw a line that, to my surprise, made my stomach clench when I opened the folder.

The Papers in the Folder

The cover bears a few simple words: “Tufts University Health Sciences Anatomical Gift Program.” The papers inside fulfill my desire to donate my body to a medical program after I have passed.

My husband and I have had wills for a long time and we updated them a few years ago. We also have health proxies that allow our children to make medical decisions for us, should we be incapacitated. We signed those documents when the concept of our deaths was certainly real but not imminent.

Now that time has drawn closer and become undeniable. It’s time to back up my plan with a few signatures and an interview.

Okay, granted, I hate paperwork. During my career I dreaded reading contracts and filling out forms. Even now, I outsource such things to my husband who actually enjoys doing it. But not these. No, I have to read and sign these documents myself. Perhaps writing this post will help me to overcome my hesitation.

Why I’m Donating My Body

Back in 2020, I wrote a post with “A Few Thoughts About Death” in which I articulated how I felt about the process of aging and inching closer to crossing the inevitable line. So, I’m aware that I will not go on forever and have ideas about what comes next. While I have no control over that, however, I can take charge of the body I leave behind.

Considering those options, I dismissed burial right away. The thought of my body being pumped full of chemicals, cosmeticized, and stuffed into an overbuilt, overpriced box is bad enough. That it will be covered with dirt and remain in the darkness and the cold horrifies me. Yes, I know I will not be present in that body when it happens or aware of the situation, but still.

Moving on to cremation, I dismissed that as an immediate solution. Certainly, it’s quick and doesn’t burden my family with enormous funeral costs. It also doesn’t involve a hole in the ground and dirt in my face. But it also seems abrupt and, in some ways, a waste. After all, if I don’t need my physical body anymore, surely someone else might.

Making a Difference

That means I still hold onto the possibility of making a difference to someone else. I am a Unitarian-Universalist and one of the hymns we sing in choir declares,

“Love is the meaning of this church
And service its law.
This is our great covenant
To dwell together in peace
To seek the truth in love
And to help one another.”

Rev. James Vila Blake

Which raised the question of how best to be of service and to help others after my spirit has moved on. The simple answer is to donate my well-used and much-appreciated body to others who will employ it for their own good purposes.

But Where to Make My Anatomical Gift?

Living as I do in Massachusetts, the first place that comes to mind for an anatomical gift is Harvard Medical School. After all, I have talked about that school many, many times when giving ghost tours and relating the history of Dr. George Parkman. I also know that some people have given their remains to the school because it was the only way they could get into Harvard.

But the Harvard Medical School has had problems recently with some pretty unsavory activities. They have not demonstrated good governance or professionalism. They have had little respect for the people who made anatomical gifts, or for their families.

Plus, Harvard is the first place most people think of for gifts of all kinds. The university is like a giant black hole that sucks in money, property, ideas, and even bodies. Enough is enough.

I crossed them off the list.

An Anatomical Gift for Tufts

But my friend and former blogging partner, Susanne Skinner has a son who graduated from Tufts University Medical School. She told me that donations of bodies for their Gross Anatomy class are very much appreciated. Suze knows first-hand that Tufts Medical School treats donated bodies with respect. They are given a ceremony of gratitude upon the class’s completion, After that the school cremates them and sends the remains to the families.

Yes, I know what happens in Gross Anatomy class. I have read “When Breath Becomes Air,” by the late neurosurgeon Dr. Paul Kalanithi. And while those things may be difficult to stomach when applied to my own body, I remind myself that I will not be there to experience them. And they are temporary, not the forever horror of a cold grave.

Sign the Papers Already

So, now all I have to do is sign the papers. And I will. This week. Next involves talking to a funeral home about transportation. And I will. Then I can cross off that item on my To Do List for 2025 and move on to other concerns. Like life and light, Christmas and celebrations, family and friends, good food and good times.

And when that all that is over for me, what happens will be up to others. I wish them well.

Note: For more information on the Tufts University Anatomical Gift Program, click here: https://medicine.tufts.edu/academics/medicine/anatomical-gift-program